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About Grief – David Kessler

The Best Things to Say to Someone in Grief

  1. I am so sorry for your loss.
  2. I wish I had the right words, just know I care.
  3. I don’t know how you feel, but I am here to help in any way I can.
  4. You and your loved one will be in my thoughts and prayers.
  5. My favourite memory of your loved one is…
  6. I am always just a phone call away
  7. Give a hug instead of saying something
  8. We all need help at times like this I am here for you
  9. I am usually up early or late, if you need anything
  10. Saying nothing, just be with the person

The Worst Things to Say to Someone in Grief

  1. At least she lived a long life, many people die young
  2. He is in a better place
  3. She brought this on herself
  4. There is a reason for everything
  5. Aren’t you over him yet, he has been dead for awhile now
  6. You can have another child still
  7. She was such a good person God wanted her to be with him
  8. I know how you feel
  9. She did what she came here to do and it was her time to go
  10. Be strong

Best & Worst Traits of people just trying to help

When in the position of wanting to help a friend or loved one in grief, often times our first desire is to try to “fix” the situation, when in all actuality our good intentions can lead to nothing but more grief. Knowing the right thing to say is only half of the responsibility of being a supportive emotional caregiver. We have comprised two lists which examine both the GOOD and the NOT SO GOOD traits of people just trying to help.

The Best Traits

  • Supportive, but not trying to fix it
  • About feelings
  • Non active, not telling anyone what to do
  • Admitting can’t make it better
  • Not asking for something or someone to change feelings
  • Recognize the loss
  • Not time limited

The Worst Traits

  • They want to fix the loss
  • They are about our discomfort
  • They are directive in nature
  • They rationalize or try to explain loss
  • They may be judgmental
  • May minimize the loss
  • Put a timeline on loss

By David Kessler

Support

  • Meeting You In Person
  • Telephone Support
  • Sharing and Caring Support Groups
  • Cafe and Lunch Groups
  • Walking Groups
  • Men’s Informal Catch Up
  • Online Zoom Support Groups
  • Guest Speakers

Contact Us Today

Westpac
Solace Grief Support Group WA Inc.

Phone: 0488 991 084
info@solacegriefsupportwa.org.au

 

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